Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
