Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
