he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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