you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
