I wanna bring you to show and tell
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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