All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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