Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits http://tfl.nu/rsyd
  Replies (54) Good night (1334) Bad night (7196)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs http://tfl.nu/syr9
  Replies (12) Good night (2614) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer. http://tfl.nu/qapf
  Replies (48) Good night (4210) Bad night (3135)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now http://tfl.nu/184c
  Replies (45) Good night (1452) Bad night (8042)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow http://tfl.nu/bfg7
  Replies (14) Good night (3347) Bad night (1415)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything http://tfl.nu/1m1m
  Replies (11) Good night (2115) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love http://tfl.nu/ef9a
  Replies (5) Good night (1443) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?" http://tfl.nu/jtkv
  Replies (7) Good night (887) Bad night (475)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face. http://tfl.nu/v2nt
  Replies (3) Good night (847) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist. http://tfl.nu/o2an
  Replies (3) Good night (982) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock http://tfl.nu/wbdd
  Replies (9) Good night (2070) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket http://tfl.nu/sq21
  Replies (2) Good night (703) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test. http://tfl.nu/cted
  Replies (1) Good night (1034) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night. http://tfl.nu/4kzv
  Replies (1) Good night (591) Bad night (302)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying... http://tfl.nu/wais
  Replies (1) Good night (302) Bad night (584)

Randomize