if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize