Your mouth is God's brothel.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
