You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
