Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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