I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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