Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
