I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
