Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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