it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize