Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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