you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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