the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
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