Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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