why didn't you poke me back
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
