Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
