If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
