i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
