Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
