It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
babies were throwing up all over the place
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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