He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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