talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
