She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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