i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Randomize