He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Randomize