I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
