You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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