P.S. I can't hear my feet
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
