the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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