Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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