wat bout pragnant strippers??
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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