I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
