am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
My breasts were aching with rage.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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