addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
