I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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