I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
