I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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