Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Well I just put wine in my tea
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize