I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Randomize