Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
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He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
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Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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