I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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