He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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