So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
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I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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