So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
