i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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